The Bride Eyes Not Her Garment...

I have now been living at Southern for a full week.  Like many people entering a new phase of life, I had a variety of expectations based on what I thought it would be like.  Currently some (key word) glitter is being cleared from my eyes, but like always I have much to praise the Lord for.  He has already granted my amazing women to connect with, a plethora of solid churches to visit, wonderful books to soak in, a group to keep me accountable in sharing the Gospel, and  a start to some SERIOUS, long needed sanctification.

When I visited Southern last fall and prayed through the decision to apply, I was overwhelmed with this thought, "If you come here, major parts of the flesh are going to go or you are going to go."   I know that may not make sense to anyone but me, so let me break it down.  I had a sense that if I came to Southern I was going to either be greatly sanctified and have to joyfully take all that comes with it, or I was going to have to leave.  There seemed to be no option for complacent living from there on out (not that there was an option before, but you get the point).  It's all in or all out.  Praise the Lord He gave me the desire for all in! What a grace to desire the things of the Lord over the things of the flesh!! 

As of late, Proverbs 31: 30 has really been doing a great work within.  The Lord tells us that "Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."  For many years I think I was mainly understanding the "beauty is vain" portion and not fully grasping the idea of charm.  How "charm" is when we point to ourselves and not to the Lord.  When we want to be gloried in, not for the Lord to be gloried in.  Example: when coming here I had this fear of proving myself.  Proving that I could handle class, the big words, being one of two women in a classroom full of men, etc. But really who gets the glory from that?  Me. What a shame! 

The attempt to "prove myself" is still all about me and that is not the Christian life.  As a woman of the Gospel, my life is to point to Christ.  I'm not called to charm those around me (or even myself) into thinking I'm so great, but to show Christ as great. To prove that HE is the strength of my bones, the one that brings understanding and wisdom, the one that has set this captive sinner free.  To Him be all praise, not to Alia. 

This thought was communicated to me again (praise the Lord) this morning.  This time though it was through the hymn "The Sands of Time Are Sinking."  The lyrics are as follows, may they bless you too to gaze not at the crown he giveth, but on His face and pierced hands: 

The sands of time are sinking, 

The dawn of heaven breaks; 

The summer morn I've sighed for - 

The fair, sweet morn awakes:

Dark, dark had been the midnight 

But dayspring is at hand, 

And glory, glory dwelleth

In Emmanuel's land

The king there in His beauty, 

Without a veil is seen:

It were a well-spent journey, 

Though seven deaths lay between:

The Lamb with His fair army, 

Doth on Mount Zion stand, 

And glory, glory dwelleth

In Emmanuel's land 

O Christ, He is the fountain, 

The deep, sweet well of love!

The streams on earth I've tasted

More deep I'll drink above: 

There to an ocean fullness 

His mercy doth expand, 

And glory, glory dwelleth 

In Emmanuel's land. 

The bride eyes not her garment, 

But her dear Bridegrooms face; 

I will not gaze at glory 

But on my King of grace.

Not at the crown He giveth

But on His pierced hand;

The Lamb is all the glory 

Of Emmanuel's Land

O I am my Beloved's 

And my Beloved is mine!

He brings a poor vile sinner

Into His house of wine 

I stand upon His merit - 

I know no other stand, 

No e'en where glory dwelleth

In Emmanuel's land

May the Lord be with you all, 

Alia